Why I'm Glad Mom Didn't Like Rap Music

Tonight while reading my 4-year old's Bible story book to her before bed, one of the narratives was about the verse that demands that parents "train up a child in the way he should go." The book's authors quite wisely encouraged the young readers to watch their parents in order to learn from them. The book asked, "When you watch your parents, what do you learn?" I rolled the dice and decided to make Elise answer the question: "What do you learn from watching Dad?" Her answers were somewhat predictable - she said she learns how to mow the lawn, brush the dog, and do grad work. I hope the list is longer by the time she's 18, but it'll do for now. (She left out spitting for distance, so I know we've got to better establish that goal this summer.)

I wrote a post about this a couple of months back, suggesting that the biggest challenge for me and other parents is to avoid the trap of giving up our lives for our kids in an act of false sacrifice. Instead, we should live well, as an example of what we want for them. Actions speak louder than words.

As I've thought about this, especially this month, I've tried to think about what habits or mannerisms I've taken from my parents. They did raise up a child in the way he should go: they demanded my best educationally, spiritually, and morally. I owe much of who I am and what I know to their instruction. But that is the obvious answer. I wondered what little behaviors I took up, somewhat unconsciously. One from my mother stands out.

Almost every Sunday morning in my youth, in the kitchen my mother quietly played hymns on the radio. I didn't think much about them; they were just there. I remember hoping I never got to the point in my life in which the best musical option would be church hymns. While I certainly wasn't sitting there waiting for Mom to be rapping out to Sir Mix a Lot (though I would have cheered that), I thought at the very least those old Eagles albums she had would be more stimulating than hundred year old organ music.

I watched, I judged, I grew older, and now. . . I've picked up the habit. On Sunday morning before church, my laptop plays a collection of hymns, and I try to keep it in a central location not only for my own enjoyment, but for my girls as well. I recognize now the value of those old hymns to my life; and I realize that in the modern church, if the girls don't hear them at home, they just might not hear them. I want them to be familiar with them so that when they forget them for ten years and stumble back upon them, they, like me will smile and remember and appreciate the poetry of those verses.

I doubt our Sunday morning ritual would exist if I hadn't watched my mother do that for so many years. I certainly didn't think then that it would have any impact on me; and when I started doing it, I didn't even remember that Mom used to. I don't know if she was trying to set an example or not; frankly, it doesn't matter. I, like all children, was watching. While most of us dreaded becoming our parents some day, in my case it's a pretty good way to go.

**Readers - if so moved, post on the comment section unique habits you picked up from your mother. I'd love to see what's been "passed down" to many of you.