Reputation Gone Awry

I'm stuck this week with commentary but no answer to the commentary. I welcome all comments - I'd love fresh perspective on this one.

The question I've been turning over in my head is this: "How should I be seen by the world? What should my reputation in the world be?"

I'm big on reputation. I teach the value of it, and I've worked hard to develop mine. Basically I believe that my daily actions slowly create a reputation amongst others, and that collection of daily actions becomes my identity to them. Most people can list qualities that they'd like to be known for or that they believe about themselves - I'm a nice person, I'm generous, I'm passionate, I'm good at my job, I love my family. . . - but the question is whether or not their daily actions reflect those things. I've tried to teach my students and my basketball players that their actions on a daily basis speak of their character and their priorities and they should be very intentional about the messages they are sending about themselves to others. This week I was confronted with my own reputation.

I found out that one of my bosses (in education you have many) doesn't necessarily like the job I do. Of course I wasn't told that by the boss (another education perk: we believe in many bosses, zero honesty and feedback), but it was by a credible source. I was also told that I'm "polarizing." At first I was very upset. I've worked at this school as a teacher and coach for 3 years now, as long as any other position I've held. I felt like when I left my previous schools, I did so after obtaining respect from students, co-workers, and bosses alike. I'm sure I wasn't liked by everyone, but I certainly felt respected by most. Now, 3 years into this position, I was told I'm seen as a polarizing figure who isn't necessarily suited for more responsibility.

I've calmed down since. When I was upset, it wasn't in self-defense; I was disappointed in myself for building this reputation and was trying to figure out how to change that. I've been doing some thinking, though. How good of a reputation do I really want in this world?

I say that because many times in the New Testament, Christ guarantees trials and tribulations in this world. He says that if you follow Him, there's a great chance the world will hate you. This is good, He says, because we are not to be of the world. If the world loves us, we fit too well in this land.

However, it is also a New Testament theme that we are to represent Christ well in all that we do. We are to be Christ (in actions) to our neighbors. When we take on the name "Christian," what we do affects the reputation of Christ and the Church. I'm not sure the best way to do that is openly alienate all those around me.

I guess the question I have to ask myself is whether or not my actions are Christ-like. Christ was polarizing. Christ spoke hard truths (in love) to others, and they got pretty pissed off about it. He had enough people hate Him that he was executed with no evidence of wrongdoing. Yet he had fiercely loyal followers.

I'm not sure what this means to me. Obviously I don't want to necessarily be polarizing. The more people I can draw to me as a credible, caring person, the better Christ is represented. More dangerous than polarizing, though, would be compromising. And if I am polarizing because I don't compromise my faith, my views of morality, and my unwillingness to accept mediocrity from students and players, then polarizing is something I can embrace.

Thoughts?