Losing

Losing sucks.

The only thing literary about that sentence is its concise nature, but I can't think of a better way to say it.

We had a bad loss last night on the basketball floor. One point loss. For many reasons, this was the worst loss I've had coaching in a couple years. Awful loss.

I've advocated several times on this blog for a high risk lifestyle as a response to my risk = reward philosophy about life. The more emotion, time, energy, money, etc. one puts into something, the greater the reward is when it works out for them. Also, that means that the risk of loss is greater with failure, as more is on the line. The more you care, the more it hurts.

Last night and today, I've been dealing with the risk burden in the above equation. Most coaches understand this. You go through the game in your head play by play, and each time you do, you hope to will the outcome into something different. You'll be driving down the road, talking to your wife, then all of a sudden you'll remember the game and want to rip the steering wheel out in frustration. It's a very "special" time in every season. And it's the price of coaching.

I've said before that I feel lucky to have something with this much on the line right now, something in my professional career that I can throw this much passion and energy and risk into. This loss confirms that. It's good to experience frustration and pain and vomit-inducing images of poor defense and missed layups at all hours of the night. It means I care. And it's good to have something to care this much about. It's the price of making one area of my life "high risk."

I figured something else out last night, too. If you risk enough in other areas of your life, it all balances out. We had a gathering at our place after the game. I really did not feel like seeing anyone after the game, but it turned out really good. A lot of good friends I hadn't seen in a while were there. We had a few drinks, told a few stories, ate a lot of food, and everything was great for a while. I went back to being frustrated once everyone left, but it was great to have a diversion for a couple of hours.

Last night, even though I lost the risk in the basketball category of my life, I reaped the rewards in the relationship category. Some people aren't willing to risk the loss of privacy or independence or deal with the possible pain involved in relationships. They operate with low risk (few relationships) and accept a lower reward. I discovered a few people that I work with this week that seem to be making that choice. They have every right to make that choice in their life.

All I know, though, is that when I lose in big risks in other areas of my life, it's good to know the rewards of those relationships will balance it all out.